I drive too fast. I know I do. I see the speed limit sign says 50 and I do 60, 65 and I do 75. Its become how I roll. I don’t have road rage. I dont cuss at people unless they are a real a-hole. I just have to be SOMEWHERE. ALL THE EFFING TIME. I have 4 kids and each one has their own schedule. I also have things I want or need to do as well. There are 24 hours in a day. There is no time to lose!

Raising a big family on my own requires an enormous amount of organization. Otherwise, it just doesn’t run smoothly. We are NOT an organized family. We are loud. We fight. We can’t find our shoes. Someone stole their sister’s gym shorts. Someone needs to pee. The baby shit his pants on the way out the door. Someone forgot to eat breakfast. Someone has a 24 page notice from school that I NEED to read RIGHT NOW. Someone forgot they need a check for flute lessons. Someone only found one shin gaurd and there’s practice today.

We have school, faith formation classes, gymnastics, soccer, football, music lessons, doctors appointments, swim lessons, homework, dinner, showers, etc. I could say “NO” to any of the “extracurricular” stuff, but I won’t. My kids want to be active. They enjoy sports and trying new things. I do wish we had more downtime and I am always trying to figure out how to juggle and get it, but I still wouldn’t say no. I love seeing them active and happy. I also know that this crazy, hectic schedule won’t last forever.

I do wish my kids would be more cooperative and understanding. After one of them just took 16 minutes to find their right shoe, they will be in the car upset that we aren’t going to be on time for something. They will ask me why I can’t go even faster. They will request an exact amount of minutes late we will be. Sometimes there are even tears. I remind them about 1000 times a week that Im doing the best I can and that everything isn’t always going to work out and be perfect. That’s life. It is what it is. Inevitably, I feel “mom guilt”. I tell myself we will be on time next time. Then, the next time, when we arrive 5 minutes late, I’m cursing and mad that it has happened again.

It seems that even when we leave early and it looks like we will make it somewhere on time, for some reason like a traffic jam or a school bus, we either just make it or are late again. We are teased by some friends because they know we will be late more than not. Many of my friends run late as well, which makes me way less stressed. I love inviting them over for dinner knowing that when the food still has 40 minutes in the oven, I will see their text about being 40 minutes late.

I wonder if there will ever come a time when we are on time for everything. I wonder if I should throw in the towel, but it’s just not my style. I know I’m doing the best I can. I want to do it all and I want my kids to do it all. I cram too much into each day. I know I do, but I have great intentions and a good heart. We are completely unorganized, but I am working little by little to change that too. Rome wasn’t built in a day, right? I have decided to continue to do the best I can at any given time. We all need to remember this in our lives. We are human. We mess up. We need to be easier on each other and ourselves! Remember, there will always be critics. Try not to be one of those. We are all here doing the best we can!

So, if you invite us to your party, please remember reheating food doesn’t bother us in the least and, if we pass you on the highway, just wave and smile. A thumbs up wouldn’t hurt either.