I didn’t grow up in a small town. I grew up in a city, population 56,843. I did summer in a small town though. It’s a beautiful town right on the water where the tourists quadruple the population of about 4,000 every summer. I was blessed enough to move to that small town full time in 2002. When I got here, all my summer friends had gone home for the winter and I pretty much didn’t know anyone. The first thing my husband and I did was to join the local track club. They welcomed us warmly with wide open arms. They were some of the most wonderful people I’ve ever met in my life. They quickly became friends and made my transition to year-round living in this small coastal town much, much easier. Since then, four children have made life a bit busy and I’m not involved much with the Track Club anymore. I still run, of course, but now it’s when I can fit it in between gymnastics and soccer and swimming class and football and school. The one thing that sticks out in my head is how loving that group really was to me, and still are today. Over the years I have realized that group is a true representation of this small town. This truly is a community with wide open arms.

For my first 26 years, I lived in a wonderful city as well. Now that I’ve spent some time in a good-sized city and a small town, I think I can honestly compare the two.

I never heard any negative comments about where I grew up until probably high school. By then, we were playing sports against other schools and going to multiple district student council functions where we were interacting with other kids from different towns and cities in our state. I started to realize that our city, where I always felt safe, had this reputation for being “tough”. For years, I sort of “went with it” somehow thinking that this chubby band chick with acne was now badass. When I went away to college, my roommate was from another, much smaller town in my state about an hour from where I lived. She looked at me like I was a thug and must have guns and drugs. Again, I got a kick out of it because…well, she was prissy as hell and I really couldn’t stand her!

When I moved year round to my forever place here by the sea, I noticed I was still hearing much of the same negativity about my city of origin. Now, it was coming from adults. These adults were supposed to be well-educated people, yet still they believed the stereotypes and rumors, even having never stepped foot in my “big” city at any point in their lives. It started to make me defensive. I loved and still love that city. My memories of growing up include amazing teachers, hanging out at the girls club after school making arts and crafts, the science fairs, taking pride in having the best softball teams in the state, playing outside with the neighborhood kids, marching in parades, and parents that were involved in the community in whatever ways possible. I was taught to get involved. I had friends from every background, every color, different beliefs and I was actually taught that this was ok. No, it was more than ok. This was GREAT. This was a representation of life! It didn’t matter how much money we had or how much money they had. It didn’t matter what side of the tracks (literally) you were from. I look back and feel that I grew up in a community that cared and still does care today. We helped one another. We stuck together. Somebody always had your back. I still have my roots there and I wouldnt change that for the world. When my husband was diagnosed with stage 4 stomach cancer and our childhood friends found out, they quickly helped in any way they could. Our awesome friends used their band to have a concert and get the community together for a giant fundraiser. They blew us away with their generosity of time, effort, and raising of money that truly helped my family more than they will ever know. I don’t even live there anymore, but I’m still supported through an amazing network of great people! Today, some of my friends are teachers there, some are police officers and firefighters, and some are running that city. I take pride in seeing how they make a wonderful city even better every day.

It is the same way I feel about where I live. This small town has already had my back on more than one occasion. This is a place where parents, teachers, police officers, firefighters, business owners, municipal workers, coaches, and residents from the North side to the East side all care about this town and the people in it. I see it where ever I go, and I’m proud.

When I had my fourth child stillborn and came home from the hospital feeling lost and overwhelmed, I was taken care of by this community. Two different churches had members going out of their way for my family. Strangers were doing my laundry to help us. Those strangers became friends. I felt supported by more than just my family. I saw a town come together for one of its own and fill a need. While my husband fought for his life, and shortly passed away 7 months later, this community came out full force in a way I never could have imagined. People helped me in every possible avenue. I felt loved and supported and humbled. I mostly felt, and still feel, blessed.

A little over a week ago, NBC aired a special segment on my small town. It was highlighting one of our elementary schools and the way they have responded to help children in our community who have either lost a parent to drug overdose or are struggling with a parent with an addiction. It also showed what they are doing to help keep children away from drugs and give them avenues to talk to trusted adults and relieve their stress in productive ways. When I watched the segment, I was filled with pride. Again, I saw a community seeing a problem here and working above and beyond to fix it. So much so, in fact, that NBC came and spread this story to the rest of the country to use our town as an example of doing good for others and as a model other cities and towns can use for their own communities!

The next day, I was appalled when I scrolled down my Facebook feed. I was pretty sure we had all watched the same segment. However, I read comments that focused on the towns drug problem. Some even going so far as to say they were glad they had gotten out of here when they did and that the town wasn’t like when they were a kid. I was seriously dumbfounded. Im not sure what rock these people have crawled out from under, but let me enlighten you. DRUGS ARE EVERYWHERE!!!!! If you think for one second that your town or city is somehow immune from drug addiction, you are so very wrong. You know people addicted to drugs or that have overcome addiction. Trust me, you do. They are your neighbors, your co-workers. Some have made it and some have not. Some are buried in the cemetary next to your grandmother. This is happening everywhere!! To act like our town has more of a problem than every other place in our country is pure ignorance, completely missing the point, and just plain WRONG.

I’m proud of NBC coming out here. I’m proud to open my eyes at the world around me and see the good. This isnt a gift. This is making a choice to be positive in a world where we are bombared by the media with negative. So much so, perhaps, that when a good, positive story comes out, some people can’t even recognize it anymore?!?

I grew up in a place where there were most definitely drugs, crime, and people who just did bad things, but there was also a sense of community. There were good things happening every day. There were teachers walking kids home from school if parents couldn’t. There were sports teams celebrating their wins at Friendly’s, there were people helping at the shelter and food pantry. There were programs and activities everywhere to help the community and the people in it and to come together for our neighbors in need. This is exactly how I see the town I live in as well. In fact, look around you. This is every town and city “from sea to shining sea”. This is our country, our amazing, wonderful country. This is where, yes, bad does happen, but so does good. There are copycat crimes. BUT, there are also copycat solutions, fundraisers, and good deeds! The good can spread, IF we choose to focus on it! Look around where you live. Really look. Think about what you want to spread in your own community. You are a catalyst. Each one of us spreads something, positive or negative, whenever we speak or perform an action. Open your eyes to the world around you. What do YOU choose to see?